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Age appropriate Development of Children and Adolescents
Children and teenagers must tackle various developmental tasks to blossom in their personality, social competence, and independence. These tasks build on each other and are essential for healthy development.

The development of children and adolescents is a dynamic process, shaped by biological maturation, social experiences, and environmental influences. While certain skills should emerge at clearly defined times, individual differences are normal. However, the pandemic has hampered the development of many children and adolescents. Lack of social contact, limited recreational opportunities, and the loss of routines have caused many children to experience developmental stagnation. This article explores age-appropriate developmental tasks, identifies which experiences are particularly important, and offers parents tips on how they can support their children and adolescents to catch up on missed opportunities.
Overview of Developmental Tasks: What Children and Young People Should Learn and When
Children and teenagers must tackle various developmental tasks to blossom in their personality, social competence, and independence. These tasks build on each other and are essential for healthy development.
Toddlerhood (0–3 Years): Trust and Exploration
- Developmental Tasks: Building basic trust, forming attachments to caregivers, motor and language development, initial emotional regulation.
- Important Experiences: Closeness and security through stable relationships, free exploration of the environment, interaction with familiar people.
- Pandemic Impact: Fewer encounters with peers, limited mobility options, lack of routine due to care cancellations.
Parent Tips:
- Encourage motor development through crawling, climbing, and balance exercises – e.g. with pillows or small obstacle courses at home.
- Support language development through songs, rhymes, and frequent reading aloud.
- Create an environment that provides security: solid routines, loving interactions, and clear rules.
Preschool Age (3-6 years): Play and Social Learning
- Developmental Tasks: Development of creativity, social skills (sharing, waiting, solving conflicts), independence, and language refinement.
- Important Experiences: Free play, group activities, interaction with peers, early role-playing games.
- Pandemic Impact: Lack of social contacts, limited group experiences, delays in linguistic and emotional development.
Parent Tips:
- Organize regular meetups with other children, for instance, playgroups or playground visits.
- Promote creativity through craft projects, painting, or dress-up games.
- Strong emotions like frustration or anger can be processed through role-playing – let your child take on the “role of the adult”.
Primary School Age (6–10 Years): Independence and Thirst for Knowledge
- Developmental Tasks: Building academic skills (reading, writing, arithmetic), social integration, emotional self-regulation, and self-esteem.
- Important Experiences: Successes in school, friendships, hobbies, and responsibilities (e.g., small tasks at home).
- Pandemic Impact: Knowledge gaps due to home-schooling, retreat into digital realms, uncertainty in social interactions.
Parent Tips:
- Support academic learning through creative approaches such as educational games or everyday experiments (e.g., cooking to combine math and chemistry).
- Promote social skills through team sports or club activities.
- Give your child responsibility, for example, in planning a small project like planting a flower bed.
Adolescence (11–18 Years): Identity and Autonomy
Adolescence is a particularly complex phase of development. Young people are faced with the challenge of developing their own identity, separating from their parents, and at the same time building stable relationships.
- Developmental Tasks:
- Building a Personal Identity: Who am I? What do I want?
- Development of Autonomy: Making Decisions and Taking Responsibility.
- Building Social and Emotional Competencies: Strengthening friendships, entering first partnerships.
- Career Orientation: Discover Interests and Strengths, Develop Goals.
- Important Experiences: Engagement with peers, conflict resolution, emotional independence, experiencing success outside the family realm.
- Pandemic Influence: Isolation, insecurities in social relationships, lack of opportunities for professional orientation.
Parent Tips for Teens:
- Strengthening Social Connections: Support your teenager in building or maintaining friendships – even through digital channels, when face-to-face meetings are difficult.
- Promote Identity Formation: Show interest in your child’s hobbies and interests, even if they differ from your own.
- Provide career guidance: Offer support with internships, workshops, or the search for areas of interest – but ultimately leave the decision to your child.
- Withstand Conflicts: Be patient when your teenager is testing boundaries. Set clear rules, but remain open to discussions.
Development Stagnation Due to the Pandemic:
- Missing Social Contacts: Children could not play in groups, form friendships, or resolve conflicts.
- Limited Movement: Decreased sports and outdoor activities have caused motor and health disadvantages.
- Emotional Insecurities: Fears and stress due to isolation, familial tensions, or financial worries burden emotional stability.
How Parents Can Compensate for Developmental Delays
Promoting Social Skills:
- Organize meet-ups with peers or enroll your child in sports clubs.
- Plan joint projects such as theatrical plays or group games to strengthen social skills.
- Promote conflict resolution skills through role-playing or board games.
Providing Emotional Security:
- Speak openly about the pandemic and its effects to address fears and concerns.
- Create routines that provide structure and security.
- Intense emotions such as anger or grief can be processed through creative methods (e.g. journaling, drawing).
Promoting Movement and Creativity:
- Plan regular outdoor activities such as hiking, cycling, or playing games in the garden.
- Promote creative hobbies like painting, music, or writing – they not only aid in development, but also in stress relief.
Practical Tips for Everyday Life
- Plan Quality Time: Deliberately spend time with your child or teenager – without any distractions from work or media.
- Allowing freedom: Enable your child to try things independently to build self-confidence.
- Being Positive Role Models: Show your child how to constructively handle challenges.
When Professional Help is Needed
- Early Intervention: For younger children with delays in motor or language development.
- Therapy: In cases of persistent fears, withdrawal, or aggressive behavior.
- Tutoring or Learning Coaching: To compensate for academic deficiencies.
Final Thoughts: Promoting Development, Even in Difficult Times
Children and teenagers are remarkably adaptable and can catch up on missed experiences with the right support. Parents play a crucial role in this: Through patience, encouragement, and a loving environment, they can help their child overcome the challenges of the past years and march into the future with strength.
Remember: Development is a process, not a race. With your support, your child or teenager can find their own path – step by step.